During the administration of President George W. Bush, Hayden famously went into self-protection mode. She stopped watching televised news, stopped reading the papers, and began to binge-watch all seven seasons of the TV drama series The West Wing.
Jed Barrett (Martin Sheen) became her president, C.J. Cregg (Allison Janney) her press secretary, and Toby Ziegler (Richard Schiff) her White House Communications Director.
Her days were devoid of concerns about public affairs, and her evenings turned into a satisfying series of one-hour therapy sessions. The nation would be faced with a dilemma and President Barrett would confront the situation and skillfully address it as only he could. When later seasons started to address his mental health challenges and some less than noble decisions about foreign actors (not meaning thespians here), the therapeutic formula was a bit less successful. Now you had to worry about the brain of two presidents, and that’s a lot to take on.
Speaking of the brain of the President, that brings me to our current situation.
I long ago made up my mind about the brain of Donald J. Trump.
But, the election was fair and square and an attention deficit disordered nation, willing to take Trump’s word for how good it was in the old days, voted to give him the keys to his old car. It’s not the one we are currently driving. It’s the one missing a headlight, sporting a hanging right side mirror, suffering from neglected oil changes, and spewing smoke from the tailpipe. It’s just like it was when he parked it in the White House garage on January 19, 2021.
As you can probably glean, I am not happy about the outcome of the election.
In fact, Hayden and I have spent recent days searching the house for our full DVD set of The West Wing. I have watched more ESPN in the last nine days than in the previous nine months and I’m sure my Smart TV is smart enough to notice that I haven’t looked at national news since election night.
I had totally dropped out of my daily political junky routine: New York Times, Washington Post, Drudge Report, CNN, MSNBC, and an occasional ice bath with Fox News. I had gone cold turkey and even started to follow William and Mary basketball. That last one is clearly a cry for help.
Then, last Thursday, at 5:15am as I was opening my eyes, I rolled over and smacked at my cell phone. Through my blurry, uncorrected vision, I saw the following headline:
Trump Names Matt Gaetz Attorney General
I swear my first thought was that it was a spoof headline from The Onion. I actually smiled as I rolled over and closed my eyes again. But my curiosity got to me, and I picked up my phone, put on my glasses, and looked at the article. It was not a spoof, but the New York Times reporting that the bomb-throwing firebrand, and disruptor of rules, decorum, and good taste Matt Gaetz had been announced as Donald Trump’s choice for the nation’s chief law enforcement officer. If confirmed by the US Senate, this man who has never run anything but his mouth will lead the 115,000 employee Department of Justice. It would likely become Trump’s Department of Retribution as he warned throughout the campaign.
After naming a Fox News weekend host as Secretary of Defense (a department with 3 million employees) and Comrade Tulsi Gabbard as Director of National Intelligence, the Gaetz appointment would fit the pattern that no matter how ill-prepared or unsuited a person is, as long as they are loyal to Donald Trump they are welcomed to the team.
As I was gathering my thoughts, I was reminded of Governor Jeb Bush’s statement at the fifth Republican primary debate of the 2016 presidential election. It was in Las Vegas, Nevada, on December 16, 2015.
“Donald, you know, is great at the one liners. But he’s a chaos candidate. And he’d be a chaos president.”
He’s not even returned to the Oval Office and already he is throwing chaos-ladened bombs from the ramparts of his castle in Mar-a-Lago.
If I am correct (and folks in my family will tell you that my recent batting average brings into question my ability to hit the curve), Trump’s current overreach will get a correction by the US Senate. The new Majority Leader Senator John Thune (R-SD) and Senator John Cornyn (R-TX) have both signaled that the Gaetz appointment might be a bridge (way) too far. Several other Senate Republicans have publicly agreed, and the Democrats are universally gob smacked.
I called on both John Thune and John Cornyn in my career and found them to be reasonable brokers and honorable public servants. I have often been disappointed by their positions, but not their integrity and that is what is about to be tested.
John Thune started his Washington career working for Senator James Abdnor of South Dakota. As a coach, teacher, state senator, and US Senator, Abdnor passed the nice guy test with flying colors and never forgot where he came from. I always thought that Thune’s exposure to that kind of Senator had a positive influence on his career. In recent days, when the Trump circle started a push for other Majority Leader candidates, Thune’s colleagues rallied around and voted him into the leadership. The independence of the Senate was made clear.
As for John Cornyn, playing games with the most important law enforcement position in the US Government will not be met with comity and grace. As a former state attorney general, supreme court jurist, and senior member of the US Senate Judiciary Committee, Cornyn will be inclined to take a dim view of the Gaetz appointment. He already stated that the FBI investigation of Gaetz’s alleged child trafficking, drug abuse, and sex with a minor charge needs to be a part of vetting his candidacy. When asked the question, the response was so swift and that a man versed in the Senate hallway dance of changing the subject clearly wanted to go on the record. Not good news for the nomination.
As a 40-year swamp dweller in Washington DC, I have my own opinion as to how much or how little damage this clown car of appointees can inflict on the work of government. In order to change the government, you need two things. A knowledge of how the system works, and the managerial ability to design and implement change.
I don’t think the Fox News Secretary of Defense, The Enemy- Schmoozing Director of National Intelligence, the Anti-Vax Secretary of HHS, or the Child-Dating Unabomber Attorney General have either of those traits. When you don’t know where the conference room light switch is located, you sit in the dark awaiting help. And metaphorically, help never comes.
Similarly, when you want to tackle a complex, multi-faceted organization, you have to know where to grab it first. Loyal, insider deputies might be the answer, but after they are sworn in, they will be loath to violate Federal law in the sweeping reforms envisioned by Trump.
And speaking of reforms, how about the Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE), led by genius and part-time belly dancing instructor Elon Musk, and always the smartest guy in the room Vivek Ramaswamy.
Let’s start with the name.
Trump calls it a “Department”, but it’s not really a government department. That would take an act of congress. To get any government funding, it would have to have an authorization, also requiring an act of congress. Now, the joy boys could self-fund it, so money won’t be a barrier. But it will be working outside of government.
Next problem is that (surprise, surprise), there are already several parts of government charged with the efficiency mission. In the Executive Branch, we have the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) that has a statutory duty to play that role. OMB also puts together the federal budget and therefore has the power to propose spending or suggest withholding of funds for purposes of efficiency and effectiveness. But note the terms “propose” and “suggest” because it is Congress that holds the power of the purse and appropriates the funding for government.
But wait, you say, the Republicans now control Congress, so no problem there. The Department of Government Efficiency just tells OMB what to cut, they tell the Congress what to cut, and the Congress makes the cuts. Let’s go play golf.
But in the famous words of Coach Lee Corso, “not so fast, my friend”.
For all of the lapdog Trump loyalist vibe in the Congress, never forget that there are three distinct groups that make up the Article I branch of government. There are the Democrats, the Republicans, and the Appropriators. The independent responsibility to assess past spending and make spending decisions creates a powerful appropriator subclass in the congress that has confounded Mike Johnson, Mitch McConell and every leader that has preceded them. They will not relinquish their power and with razor thin majorities on both sides, this is difficult to navigate.
Budget Reconciliation (for you insiders) is clearly a way to circumnavigate some of those obstacles, but Mike Johnson and his team have not appeared adept at using that process to great advantage. With his current majority, he will still have to get some democrats to buy in, and that has proven difficult.
One last thing. As an entity external to the federal government, any recommendation of DOGE that could possibly result in financial benefit to Elon Musk, Vivek Ramaswamy or any of their associated enterprises would be a conflict of interest and wind up in the courts before you could say OpenAI.
So, our president-elect has thrown his first plate of spaghetti against the wall. Some of it may well stick, but we shouldn’t head to the airport just yet. While we are following through with “Operation West Wing” (we found the DVD’s) at our house, I remain hopeful that there are still enough checks and balances left to reign in the tyrant. But in spite of my political DNA, I don’t have to watch.
Blow up your TV
Throw away your paper
Go to the country
Build you a home
Plant a little garden
Eat a lot a peaches
Try and find Jesus on your own
John Prine
Spanish Pipedream, 1971